Tuesday, March 17, 2009

Depression Central; Population: Me

So, I was watching Oprah today and it turns out that I meet Dr. Oz's five signs of depression. SWEET. Here's the test, in case you want to also self-diagnose yourselves:
  • Lack of Energy. Are you more sluggish than normal?
  • Weight Gain or Loss. Have you been eating more or less than you're supposed to?
  • Trouble Sleeping. Do you have trouble falling asleep? Or trouble getting out of bed?
  • Lack of Concentration. Do you have trouble keeping your mind focused?
  • Apathy. Have you lost the love, the zest, for the hobbies you have in your life?

I kinda feel like all my problems really stem from my inherent laziness, so perhaps I'm not depressed but just REALLY freakishly abnormally lazy. Is there a pill for lazy?

And, according to my pregnant friends, these are also all nasty side effects of having a parasite growing inside you. I'm gonna write a book and call it "Fat And Tired? You're Pregnant and/or Depressed." I think it'll be a top seller.

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1 comment:

  1. AnonymousMarch 18, 2009 at 9:18 AM

    i have to tell you a story. when I was first preggo and hadn't yet told anyone at work, a coworker was asking around about me. he kept on saying, "Is she ok? She looks like she's either depressed or pregnant."

    gee, thanks. thanks a lot.

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